A New Year's Post: Realistic Resolutions

            I keep trying to think about what my New Year resolution should be. I don’t want to do the typical “get in shape” or “learn a new hobby” kind of resolution. Those kinds of resolutions only stick at the beginning of the year. It’s easy to work out or practice a new instrument in January. It’s also easy to just give up and put that gym membership card or hand-me-down guitar away in a place where it’s forgotten until the next year rolls around and the cycle starts all over again. 

I want to do something that will stick all year round, something that I know I can look back at by the end of the year and be proud of doing.

A realistic resolution.

            My resolution for this past year of 2014 was to mature. In 2013, I went through a rebellious stage and my relationship with my mom struggled quite a bit. So when the New Year came, I made a promise to myself that I would do my best to mature throughout the year whenever I had the chance.

            This wasn’t the kind of resolution I could just practice for a month and then give up on. It was more arbitrary. Every time there was a hardship, whether it occurred once a month, weekly, every day, or not, I would find myself encountering chances to practice my maturity.

It wasn’t something I could avoid like the other two common resolutions I mentioned. It’s easy to avoid the gym or put away the guitar to ignore the resolutions, but when I found myself in a situation where I had only the two choices of acting mature or immature, it wasn’t so easy to avoid the promise I had made to myself.

            Looking back on this past year, I can honestly say I think I’ve fulfilled my resolution. Like I said, since the resolution was different, it was more achievable. Being in shape and learning a new hobby are clearly definable. For example, loosing fifty pounds, and being able to run a few miles when before I couldn’t, would qualify as “being in shape.” Also, going from never having picked up a guitar to knowing the basic chords and some simple songs qualify as having “learned a new hobby.”

            But how can one define maturity?

It’s difficult to say the least. “Mature” could mean anything from being able to handle any crisis and avoiding all drama to simply respecting my parents more often. It’s relative. Technically, so can “being in shape” and “learning a new hobby,” but not as much. I think that’s why my resolution stuck. No matter what, even if I slipped up and acted immaturely from time to time, so long as the next chance I opted for maturity, I was still making progress.

            For me, striving for maturity was a more realistic resolution, and I’m glad to say I think I’ve met it.

            As for 2015, I want another resolution like the one I made for 2014. I want something just as arbitrary and just as achievable, something where even the slightest bit of improvement will leave me satisfied by the time 2016 rolls around.

            What I think I’m going to go for is this: “to grow in faith.” I’ve had my fair share of doubts this year and ran into a few bumps in the road on my spiritual journey with God. For next year, I want to make sure I face those bumps with better traction. Like with the “maturity” promise, the chances to work on the “faith” resolution will come at random, but in the end I think I will feel just as fulfilled.

            Maybe “growing in faith” is not a very realistic resolution for others, but it is for me. I invite anyone who wants to join me to, well, join me! I also think my last year’s resolution to mature is one worth trying (I know as teens that can be difficult, but hey, I mean, we won’t be teens forever, might as well practice.). If not, any resolution that seems more realistic is better worth making then something we all know isn’t going to stick (Like I said, who wants to keep lying to themselves about getting in shape? If that treadmill didn’t call for me last year, it won’t call for me this year.)

I think if people could make more realistic resolutions for themselves, they’ll be more inclined to keep them and be happier at the end of the year. And if the resolution is something like, say, “growing in faith,” I think that’s something worth praying to God for help fulfilling. I’m sure God wants our New Year to be just as fruitful as we do.

Happy New Year!

A Christmas Post: A Christian Santa Claus

            With the holidays coming up soon, I find myself seeing a lot of “Keep Christ in Christmas” in churches and on social media. As much as I agree with the statement, I’ve also noticed paranoia with the idea of Santa Claus that I think is over the top. Many Christians don’t like the idea of Santa Claus because they feel it distracts too much from the truth of Christmas, which is Jesus’ birth. Some Christians even take it so far as not giving gifts on Christmas.

            As usual, I think all of this hoopla is ridiculous.

            I’m not saying we shouldn’t remember Jesus. Of course not, Jesus is the whole point! And I’m also not saying this because I love getting presents (I actually prefer giving presents more because I find that more fun). But, as always, I believe there should be a balance.

            The perfect example is this movie I saw last week with Whoopi Goldberg called, Call Me Claus (by the way, spoilers). It’s pretty funny since Whoopi becomes Santa by the end, but the original Santa is who drew my attention. This Santa was different. There was something about him that struck me and by the end of the film I realized what.

            This Santa was a Christian Santa.

            I had never realized it before. The reason why so many Christians don’t like Santa is because he seems to symbolize a kind of non-Christian Christmas. But yet, there I was, watching a movie with a Santa who acknowledged Jesus as the entire reason for Christmas.

            There was one particular scene where this all jumped out to me. Santa was struggling to convince Whoopi’s character, Lucy, that he truly was Santa and that she was his successor. He was beginning to lose hope, so his top elf took him to get some Christmas cheer. The elf brought Santa to a church, where Lucy’s niece was singing her solo to the popular Christmas hymn, “Go Tell It on the Mountain,” which talks about spreading the word of Jesus’ birth.

With his spirits lifted, Santa turns to his elf and says something along the lines of, “This is what Christmas is all about. I can’t give up now.” (Don’t quote me on that, though. It wasn’t like I was taking notes during the movie to get it word for word.)

There was more, though. One of the reasons why Lucy didn’t believe in Santa was because, as a child, she asked Santa to bring her father back from war, but instead her father died. When Santa finally gets the chance to talk to the adult Lucy about that incident, he reminds her that Santa isn’t God and how when these devastating things happen that we can’t explain, we just need to remember that our loved ones continue to live on in our hearts.

It’s a beautiful message and definitely a Christian one. Heck, Santa even tries to sell a Christmas calendar where one would move baby Jesus each day getting closer to Bethlehem. These were just some of the ways in which I saw this Santa as Christian, but there were other instances in the movie (despite how corny it gets at times with the side effects, it really is a nice film worth watching for the holidays).

The whole point is that I think a balance can exist between the whole Santa craze and keeping Christ in Christmas. This movie is proof of that.

I think doing away with the whole Santa Claus idea is sad. Believing in Santa Claus is one of the many ways kids learn to have faith. The idea of being watched to see whether a child has been good or bad during the past year and then rewarded based on the child’s goodness is a way to teach kids about actions having consequences, which leads to a more mature understanding of sins. And Santa’s generosity is symbolic of God’s, which is infinitely greater.

But also, on the other side, I do understand how only focusing on Santa Claus and presents does tend to keep Christ out of Christmas. We still need to be reminded that Christmas is celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ, God on Earth born in human form to a young virgin adolescent named Mary. It wasn’t easy for Mary and Joseph, but they did what they could to bring into this world the most amazing gift of all, Jesus. (And I know people dispute whether Jesus’ birth really was in December, but I don’t think that’s important. It’s celebrated in December now and that’s all that matters.)

Like I always say, balance. There can be a balance between the Santa Claus hype and the strict Christ in Christmas attitude. Why can’t Santa be Christian? The Call Me Claus movie proves that he can be. Christmas is a wondrous time of year, but I don’t want to get swept up into the Santa Claus hype and I don’t want to ignore the many traditions associated with Christmas either.

To me, Santa is Christian, and though he might come down my chimney on Christmas Eve and put presents underneath the tree for me, I know he’ll be doing it to celebrate the true gift that doesn’t need to be wrapped or given, Jesus Christ.

(And no, I don’t still believe in Santa Claus, but I think I’ve made my point.)

Have a merry, blessed, Christmas!

A Thanksgiving Post: Be Thankful on Your Own Time

            Right away, I’m just going to apologize that this is such a short post. I’ve been extremely busy, but I wanted to get this off my chest.

            A friend of mine did a presentation in one of my classes on how some businesses, such as K-Mart and Target, are having Black Friday sales that begin on Thanksgiving. As a result, many employees are forced to work during a time when they should be at home celebrating with their families. These stores exploit their power over their employees, threatening to fire anyone who is not willing to sacrifice their Thanksgiving for their job.

            I think that is just horrible. Thanksgiving is a day to spend time with family and be thankful for all that God has given us. How greedy is it to deprive people of that opportunity! No one should be told when he or she can or cannot give thanks.

            I admit, we are all supposed to be thankful year round about the many blessings God bestows on us. However, Thanksgiving is a day dedicated to just that. Of course, the origins of the holiday come from the Pilgrims and the Native Americans (who I’m sure didn’t really sit down and eat together all lovey-dovey, but it’s the principal of the thing) and all that jazz. It is a holiday that commemorates the idea of being thankful in general, so it is not necessarily a Christian holiday. Regardless, Christians direct that thankfulness to God every year on the fourth Thursday of November.

            And yet, here are these businesses that want to take even that away. It’s times like these that sadden me. It opens my eyes to how dark the world can be sometimes. Well, I refuse to support this along with my friend. Black Friday madness is one thing, but expanding it to Thanksgiving is another. So tomorrow, I will be eating and celebrating, putting aside a specific day to thank God for all of the many blessings He has given me.

            God deserves to be thanked at all times, especially tomorrow. 

A Halloween Post: Candy, Costumes, and Christians

            I’m just going to come out and say it. Yes, I do dress up on October 31^st. Yes, I have gone out trick-or-treating with my friends on October 31^st. No, I do not celebrate “Halloween.”

            What I mean is I don’t celebrate Halloween as the way many think of it. I don’t dress up like a devil, go to haunted houses, pull pranks on the neighbor houses and scare my siblings half to death. Some say that’s all the fun there is to do on October 31^st, but that’s just not how I was raised.

            In my house, my mom has always been careful when it comes to Halloween. She would put up decorations, such as a wreath on the door made of colorful leaves and pinecones, or an un-carved pumpkin. When I wanted to wear a costume, she always made sure to explain to me what costumes were appropriate to wear as a Christian. As I grew up, I gradually understood the difference between the Halloween some of my non-Christian friends were celebrating and what we were celebrating.

            My family was celebrating autumn, or harvest.

            There’s a lot of controversy over whether or not Christians should celebrate Halloween. Some people do inappropriate things on the day. The origins are pagan. There are quite a few reasons people question the holiday.

            Personally, I don’t see anything wrong with dressing up and going trick-or-treating. Halloween has its pagan roots, but so does Christmas even (such as the tree). I think so long as Christians steer clear of doing anything they feel uncomfortable doing, such as dressing up like the devil (big no no), and keep in mind that the harvest can also be celebrated, I think Christians can have a fun time on October 31^st instead of sitting inside with the lights off avoiding trick-or-treaters like the plague (or ebola, that’s a big thing now).

            One other particular reason why I like the idea of Christians participating on October 31^st is that it is a great chance to share the gospel.

            I specifically remember one October 31^st when I was younger when I went to a neighbor’s house to trick-or-treat. A kind, elderly Asian woman greeted me and, with a big, warm, smile on her face, placed a bag of goodies into my pillowcase of candy. After conversing with her for a few minutes about how cute I looked (I was a cat), I gave my thanks and skipped off with my mom. The last thing I heard was, “God bless!”

            Later that night, I was going through my goodies to see what I wanted and what I would trade when I came upon the bag my neighbor had given me. It was clear and had a colorful ribbon tied around the top to seal the bag. I could see the assorted candies in the bag, but also a little booklet.

            Curious and nerdy as I am (I have always loved books), I rushed to open the bag and read the booklet. It was a story about a brother and sister at a costume store with their mother, picking out costumes. The boy wanted to be a cowboy and the girl a princess. Suddenly, they came upon an assortment of scary masks, including witches, ghouls, devils, etc.

            The girl was so startled she began to cry. Her mom heard and came up to her. The girl asked why there were so many scary things for Halloween. The mom explained how some people believed Halloween was a time for scaring and trickery, but that their family didn’t do that because that’s not what Christians do. She then explained that was why they were celebrating the time of harvest, which was a beautiful part of God’s creation, instead of a scary Halloween.

            At the end of the booklet it reminded the reader about Jesus’ love and to use the holiday to spread God’s word.

            I will never forget that booklet, though I unfortunately lost it some time ago. It was the first time I realized I could do more than just celebrate harvest on October 31^st. I could use it as a time for community to spread the gospel to those kids who do trick-or-treat for Halloween, unaware of Jesus’ love.

            “Halloween,” so to speak, isn’t for every Christian. Some Christians feel uncomfortable celebrating anything on that day, and that’s okay. Others are comfortable. It’s always simply important to keep Jesus in mind. I personally think October 31^st is a great day to witness for Jesus to many who celebrate without knowing Him.

            I also think if Jesus were around today, He wouldn’t be avoiding trick-or-treaters. He’d be outside, greeting anyone who came up to Him, and sharing His love.

            But hey, that’s just what I think.

To Date or Not to Date a Non-Christian

            One big topic with Christian teens is whether or not to date non-Christians. There are many reasons why any Christian worries about dating a non-Christian, such as disagreements over moral values, differences in future plans, etc. Many think marriages are doomed when the couple isn’t the same religion, the main reason usually being raising kids.

When it comes to teens, though, the differences might seem frivolous. We’re not planning on getting married, so what’s the harm in dating a non-Christian?

Well, recently, one of my friends’ atheist best friends went through a break up with her Christian boyfriend. Since they were together for a few years, my friend thought they overcame their religious differences, but in the end it still got to them.

Here’s my take on the subject.

There was one specific non-Christian guy I dated. I remember turning him down the first few times he asked me out because of our religious differences. I just thought that our relationship would have no future because of it.

Looking back, I know I was right.

Don’t get me wrong. He was a good guy and I don’t regret our relationship at all. In fact, we ended up dating for quite a long time. We were very happy at first. For a while there, it seemed like our religious differences didn’t matter. We loved each other and respected each others beliefs and that was all we needed to know.

But no matter how we hard we tried, our religious differences got in the way.

I remember days when all we’d do was just sit and debate our religious differences. Sometimes I’d even get seriously offended. None of the arguments were ever resolved and they always ended the same way.

“Let’s change the subject.”

Our relationship simply wasn’t going to go anywhere unless one of us was willing to step back from our beliefs for the sake of the relationship. I don’t know if he would have, but I knew that wasn’t going to be me.

Maybe we were both just being stubborn. Maybe I could have brought him to Jesus. Maybe not. All I know was that our religious differences opened my eyes to all of the other differences that we had as a result. Soon enough, I realized that things were going downhill fast.

Still, I feared letting him go. What if no one else loved me the way he did? He was the first guy I ever loved. Could I ever love anyone else that way again?

We eventually did break up. As difficult and heart aching as it was, though, we were both happier in the long run. I prayed that God would bring each of us the person He had in mind for us and just left it in God’s hands.

Let me just say I don’t believe all non-Christian and Christian relationships are doomed. In fact, I have another Christian friend who brought her boyfriend to Jesus. Perhaps I could’ve converted my ex-boyfriend likewise. But I don’t think anyone should go into a relationship planning on changing the other person, no matter what needs changing. The person should want to change on his or her own and that’s difficult to achieve. Unless someone is willing to put all of that time, effort, and faith in, it’s not going to work out.

Personally, I wasn’t ready for that.

Still, I don’t think the relationship was a waste. We both learned to love and learned what it was like to date someone from a different religious background. I know I cleared up many Christian misconceptions he had, and I pray that perhaps that softened his heart enough so someone else in the future could bring him to Jesus.

All right, here’s my last two cents and then I’ll shut up.

Dating is a fun time to get to know each other, perhaps even leading to a first love. But with all of the differences that already come within relationships, religious ones just make things more difficult. Two Christians may disagree on the kind of music they like, but a Christian and non-Christian could disagree on how to respect parents, what’s appropriate on a date physical-wise, whether or not drinking is okay, etc.

I just think dating a Christian removes one more difference, hopefully leaving space for a little more fun.

For me, I’ve had the experience of dating a non-Christian and even though I don’t regret the relationship, I’ve learned I’d rather only date Christians. When I get married someday, I don’t want to deal with religious differences on top of everything else. My parents were both Christian and still divorced, so why add to that? Maybe someone else with a higher level of patience, respect, and work ethic can, and I say all power to them, but it’s just not for me. I’d rather just continue praying to God for a good Christian guy.

Oh, actually, guess what? God has already begun to answer that prayer.