Love Thy (Gay) Neighbor

            “God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.”

            “Oh yeah? Well the Bible also says ‘Lot and his daughters,’ not ‘Lot and his sons.’”

            There is no other theological debate that I am more tired of hearing about than the one on homosexuality. The main reason why it bothers me is because it’s tearing the Christian church apart. It’s almost like I walk into a church, someone asks me whether or not I’m okay with homosexuality, and then I’m either welcomed in or shunned depending on my answer.

            That’s not right.

            Here’s my dilemma. I am absolutely horrified at the way “Christians” are treating homosexuals. Not only that, I can’t even say for sure whether or not I believe homosexuality is a sin. Currently, I feel myself leaning towards the belief that it’s not.

            Shocker! Well, I did say I don’t have conventional views on matters.

            Let me start with the fact that I’m not gay. I like guys and want to have a husband someday. Hopefully, my heterosexuality can give me some impartiality on the subject.

            Now, ever since I was aware of the homosexuality debate, I have always called myself “neutral territory.” I wasn’t for or against gay people. If someone was against, fine. If someone was gay, fine. It didn’t matter either way for me. Although I still have the same non-judgmental attitude, I have taken the issue a lot more seriously lately.

Why? Because I’ve begun to notice the horrible way Christians are treating their gay neighbors.

How could “Christians” go to church and then look down in disgust at the gay person sitting in the pew next to them? How could they ignore their own sins while they judge anyone who shows even the slightest hint of being gay? How could they believe they are supposed to hate homosexuals? How could they believe God hates homosexuals?

It baffles me.

Jesus says, “Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than this” (Mark 12:31). He doesn’t say to love someone because I agree with his or her lifestyle choices. He doesn’t say to love someone because I know he or she is not sinning. He doesn’t say, “Love someone because” at all. He just commands to love. Period.

Now saying this, I know that doesn’t mean if we don’t agree with someone who is, say, a drug addict, that we should hang around him or her all the time and pick up bad habits in the name of love. It does mean, though, that we shouldn’t hate him or her.

All right, after getting that off my chest, let me go back to why I’m leaning more towards the idea that homosexuality is not a sin. I do want to state that I don’t want to force anyone to agree with me, I just want to express my musings on the subject.

So, there are several “sins” in the Bible that are no longer considered sins. For example, no one is supposed to touch a woman when she is on her period because she is considered impure (Leviticus 15:19). (Well, then I guess many of my friends who have hugged me during my time of the month have sinned. Whoops!) Commandments, such as this one, are considered outdated and no longer valid, so to speak. “Cultural variation” is the term I have heard. Some parts of the Bible have to be seen in relation to their cultural context; it should not be taken literally word for word, without analyzing.

When I revealed my observation, one of my Christian friends told me there are parts of the Bible that should be taken literally and others figuratively. I agreed, but when I asked how to discern what parts to take literally or figuratively, my friend replied, “Oh, you just know.”

            Well, I don’t think you can “just know.” I think the Bible needs to be considered and deeply analyzed based on its cultural context to be able to understand what is most relevant and important for us as Christians today. If we followed the Bible literally without doing so, then there would still be slavery in our society and women would not have rights. I don’t think I should be focused on whether or not I need to wear a head covering because I’m a woman and the Bible says so (1 Corinthians 11) when I should be more focused on other pressing matters, like my sexual purity as an unmarried young adult, for example. 

The way I see it, a sin is a sin because it has consequences. If I lie to my mom, I’ve hurt her and myself. If I cheat on my boyfriend, I’ve ruined my relationship. If I have sex before marriage and then get dumped by my boyfriend (or get pregnant or an STD), I’ve lost my self-respect (and get myself in trouble to boot). And if I have an addiction, I'm going to lose everything. 

Sins also include a lack of love. Obviously, if I lie to my mom, I care more about the benefits that come with the lie than I do her. If I cheat on my boyfriend, I care more about gratifying my own desires than I do my boyfriend’s feelings. If I decide to have sex before marriage, I’m more than likely acting on lust than love. And if I have an addiction, it's all about satisfying my life-threatening desires. There's no love in any of these cases, whether for myself or others. 

There are exceptions, though, no? I might lie to my mom to save her from something horrible. I might cheat on accident (though I find that one difficult to imagine). I might even decide to have premarital sex because I’ve been in a loving, committed relationship for years, but cannot get married for some reason. And technically, I could be addicted to a good thing, like reading the Bible everyday. 

            Well, what about homosexuality? I agree that a gay couple that decides to act on their lust for each other is a sin because 1) there will be consequences, just like with a heterosexual couple and 2) there is no love. But what about a committed, loving, Christian gay couple that wants to wait until marriage, growing closer to God in the meantime, like any faithful, Christian straight couple? Why should one couple be praised while the other one is condemned? Apparently, it’s because the gender of the people in the couple matters.

            I see no logic in that (and I won’t even get into the problem of gender and the biological/psychological debate on it).

            Now I know there are so many arguments about what the Bible does and does not say about homosexuality. I’m not an educated theologian so I’m not going to debate the Bible scriptures as if I am one. Heck, I’m not even sure if the parts of the Bible I do get are understood correctly. I’m only human; I’m a sinner and I’m flawed. I accept that.

            Which is why I refuse to judge homosexuals and plan to leave the judgment to He who holds the almighty gavel up in heaven.

But I will say this. The debate between homosexuality and Christianity needs to stop dividing churches, youth groups, Christian friends, and every other Christian in the world. We are all God’s children. Should we deny an alcoholic to come to church? Should we deny a liar a seat at our table? No! Jesus spent time with the people who were considered the lowest of the low, such as prostitutes and lepers. So if homosexuality is a sin, who cares?! I know I will welcome them into church, hug them, and love them no matter what because nothing is more important than sharing the love of Christ.

            Absolutely nothing.

Note: I found a great website on homosexuality and Christianity: the Gay Christian Network. What I found most interesting is the whole idea of “The Great Debate” within the gay Christian community, arguing the Traditionalist vs. Reformed view on the position of homosexuality in Christianity today. I'm not going to lie. Many of the ideas I spoke about in this blog post came from and were inspired by these essays, especially the reformed one. Credit is due where credit is due. I recommend reading the original essays if anyone is as interested in the subject as I am.

Also, there's a great article, "I'm Christian, Unless Your Gay" that I think takes what I'm saying and breaks it down even further. Just in case anyone's interested!

A Halloween Post: Candy, Costumes, and Christians

            I’m just going to come out and say it. Yes, I do dress up on October 31^st. Yes, I have gone out trick-or-treating with my friends on October 31^st. No, I do not celebrate “Halloween.”

            What I mean is I don’t celebrate Halloween as the way many think of it. I don’t dress up like a devil, go to haunted houses, pull pranks on the neighbor houses and scare my siblings half to death. Some say that’s all the fun there is to do on October 31^st, but that’s just not how I was raised.

            In my house, my mom has always been careful when it comes to Halloween. She would put up decorations, such as a wreath on the door made of colorful leaves and pinecones, or an un-carved pumpkin. When I wanted to wear a costume, she always made sure to explain to me what costumes were appropriate to wear as a Christian. As I grew up, I gradually understood the difference between the Halloween some of my non-Christian friends were celebrating and what we were celebrating.

            My family was celebrating autumn, or harvest.

            There’s a lot of controversy over whether or not Christians should celebrate Halloween. Some people do inappropriate things on the day. The origins are pagan. There are quite a few reasons people question the holiday.

            Personally, I don’t see anything wrong with dressing up and going trick-or-treating. Halloween has its pagan roots, but so does Christmas even (such as the tree). I think so long as Christians steer clear of doing anything they feel uncomfortable doing, such as dressing up like the devil (big no no), and keep in mind that the harvest can also be celebrated, I think Christians can have a fun time on October 31^st instead of sitting inside with the lights off avoiding trick-or-treaters like the plague (or ebola, that’s a big thing now).

            One other particular reason why I like the idea of Christians participating on October 31^st is that it is a great chance to share the gospel.

            I specifically remember one October 31^st when I was younger when I went to a neighbor’s house to trick-or-treat. A kind, elderly Asian woman greeted me and, with a big, warm, smile on her face, placed a bag of goodies into my pillowcase of candy. After conversing with her for a few minutes about how cute I looked (I was a cat), I gave my thanks and skipped off with my mom. The last thing I heard was, “God bless!”

            Later that night, I was going through my goodies to see what I wanted and what I would trade when I came upon the bag my neighbor had given me. It was clear and had a colorful ribbon tied around the top to seal the bag. I could see the assorted candies in the bag, but also a little booklet.

            Curious and nerdy as I am (I have always loved books), I rushed to open the bag and read the booklet. It was a story about a brother and sister at a costume store with their mother, picking out costumes. The boy wanted to be a cowboy and the girl a princess. Suddenly, they came upon an assortment of scary masks, including witches, ghouls, devils, etc.

            The girl was so startled she began to cry. Her mom heard and came up to her. The girl asked why there were so many scary things for Halloween. The mom explained how some people believed Halloween was a time for scaring and trickery, but that their family didn’t do that because that’s not what Christians do. She then explained that was why they were celebrating the time of harvest, which was a beautiful part of God’s creation, instead of a scary Halloween.

            At the end of the booklet it reminded the reader about Jesus’ love and to use the holiday to spread God’s word.

            I will never forget that booklet, though I unfortunately lost it some time ago. It was the first time I realized I could do more than just celebrate harvest on October 31^st. I could use it as a time for community to spread the gospel to those kids who do trick-or-treat for Halloween, unaware of Jesus’ love.

            “Halloween,” so to speak, isn’t for every Christian. Some Christians feel uncomfortable celebrating anything on that day, and that’s okay. Others are comfortable. It’s always simply important to keep Jesus in mind. I personally think October 31^st is a great day to witness for Jesus to many who celebrate without knowing Him.

            I also think if Jesus were around today, He wouldn’t be avoiding trick-or-treaters. He’d be outside, greeting anyone who came up to Him, and sharing His love.

            But hey, that’s just what I think.

A Comfortable Christian

            I’ve become a comfortable Christian and I’m uncomfortable with that.

            About a week ago, I went to a teen women’s Bible study. I remember we got off topic and started talking about the call we have as Christians to spread the gospel, no matter what opposition we may face.

             One girl pointed out how so many of us fear offending anyone with our beliefs that we keep Jesus to ourselves instead of sharing His love. We don’t want to step out of our comfortable, Christian bubble to reach someone out of fear of being offensive.

            I started to wonder: Have I become so comfortable as a Christian that I’m afraid of being offensive?

            A specific example came to mind. In my English class, we read a spiritual autobiography. We were doing group work and I found myself on the opposite spectrum of a debate. The first part of the debate was about whether the voices the narrator heard were demons or a side effect of her depression. The second part was about whether religion saved her or was religion a defense mechanism to deal with her depression.

            There was a guy in my group who had a depressed parent and he argued that what his parent went through was similar to the narrator. He disagreed with all of the “religious nonsense,” as he called it, and made his case. I could tell he felt strongly about the topic, so I mainly stayed quiet, as if I was neutral on the matter.

            But I wasn’t.

            Having gone through depression myself, I felt my own connection to the narrator and came up with my own ideas. My idea was that the devil used the depression to his advantage. I also believed that though religion might have been a defense mechanism, in the end, God was what truly saved the main character, just as He saved me. Out of fear, though, that I would be offensive to the guy with the depressed parent, I didn’t say much.

            But I should have.

            Why was I so afraid of being offensive? Isn’t that what happens when we disagree with societal mainstream ideas, as Christianity seems to always do nowadays?

            Or has it always been like that?

            As these thoughts ran through my mind during Bible study, the same girl pointed out something else that struck me. She said, “Jesus must have been the most offensive person on Earth.”

            I completely agree.

            Jesus was so different from what everyone was expecting, that He constantly offended people. He worked on the Sabbath. He sat with all kinds of people society looked down on. He had “radical” ideas, so to speak.

Jesus was so bothersome to society that He still offends people today!

            But here’s the thing. It wasn’t Jesus’ motive to offend people. It was the message He was giving. And that’s what I think Christians, including myself, don’t understand sometimes. If we respectfully spread Jesus’ message and people are offended as a result, that’s their problem.

What matters is whether or not we’re trying to be offensive.

            I should’ve realized that when I was in class. Obviously if I was trying to be offensive and said something like, “Well, I think you’re wrong and your parent is wrong. I’m right in believing this, so screw you,” then I’m sure even God would be upset with me. But if I respectfully disagreed and simply pointed out my views, even if no one agreed with me, I’m sure no one would have been offended.

            And even if someone were to be offended, it wasn’t like that would’ve been my intention. God would’ve understood.

             I’ve become too comfortable as a Christian. It’s like I’ve accepted Jesus as my Savior and left it at that, but there’s so much more to being a Christian. Spreading God’s message is part of Christianity, even if it means stepping out of my comfort zone and risking being accidentally offensive.

            C.S. Lewis put it best when he said, “If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity” (“Quotes”).

             I’ll keep that in mind next time God calls me to step out of my Christian comfort zone again.

Sources:

“Quotes by C.S. Lewis.” Goodreads.com. Goodreads, n.d. Web. 30 Sept. 2014.

Texting for God

Note: Some spoiler alerts on the new God’s Not Dead movie.

            I felt this need to write about what just happened to me after I watched the movie, God’s Not Dead, at the movie theatre last Friday. For those who haven’t seen the movie, I’ll try not to go too much into detail and just mention what’s important for this post.

At the end of the movie, there’s a scene at a concert where everyone’s encouraged to text every person on his or her contacts list, “God’s not dead.” The logic behind it was that if there were 1,000 people there and each person texted 100 people, than it’d be like telling Jesus we love Him 100,000 times. After the movie ends, the audience is prompted to join.

How could I say no?

Here’s the thing, though. It’s easier said than done. The moment I took out my phone and wrote those three words, it was difficult to picture myself sending it to everyone on my contacts list.

Sure, I could easily send it to my youth group friends, my Christian camp friends, my family members…but what about everyone else? What about my classmates, my other friends, my colleagues? What about everyone who wasn’t Christian?

The last thing I wanted to do was offend anyone. I pictured myself getting dozens of offended texts, somewhere along the lines of, “How dare you send that to me? You know I’m an atheist!”

I could also get offensive texts too, like, “Screw you and your Christianity!” or worse. I’d be the one offended then and there’d be no one to blame because I asked for it.

Suddenly, pressing send didn’t seem like a good idea.

Then I started thinking. I wasn’t saying anything offensive with my text. If the person didn’t agree, they didn’t agree. And if someone responded offensively to me, I didn’t need to take that personally. Besides, it wasn’t like I was doing this for any of them, or even for me.

I was texting for the one I was texting about: God.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I began to send the text. First, I sent it to all of the contacts under A. By then, the movie was over and everyone was exiting. When I got up, though, I noticed something wonderful.

Practically everyone, especially the teenagers, was texting.

Now, don’t judge me. It wasn’t that I was doing it just because everyone else was, but the fact that I wasn’t the only person, or even teenager, filled me with strength. For a brief moment, there was a room full of teenagers saying, “So what? I’m a Christian teenager and I’m going to text for God.”

So, I kept texting, moving down the alphabetical list. As I kept sending, I kept expecting the worst.

Here are the results:

Total people texted: 170

No responses: 78

Total responses: 92, and of those responses:

            35 responded with some sort of confusion

            26 agreed in some form

            20 asked, “Who is this?”

                        4 of these overlap with agreed

                                    6 referenced the song, “God’s Not Dead” by Newsboys

                                    4 referenced the movie, God’s Not Dead

                                    2 started a philosophical conversation

                                    2 gave completely unrelated responses

                                    1 responded offensively

           

            I’ll just say it. I was flabbergasted. Yes, flabbergasted. Why? Because of all of the responses I received, not one person responded offended and only one gave me an offensive response.

Honestly, it was such a pleasant surprise that it left me thinking why I was so scared to do it in the first place. Why couldn’t I just text for God? I talk, sing, dance, etc. for Him, but I hesitated on texting for Him. Why?

Maybe it was the randomness that threw me off. Maybe I wasn’t prepared for the possible responses. Maybe I just wasn’t as brave to tell the world about Him as I thought. Maybe it’s because of all of those reasons. Maybe not.

The truth is, I don’t have a complete answer for this question, but what I do know is maybe I’m not as afraid to text for Him anymore. This experience taught me that I could do something I’d never thought of, text for God. It’s just another way to reach others about Him, so why not go for it?

Seriously, why not?